Thursday, October 23, 2014


Sometimes I terrify myself and think that real love doesn't exist.  I haven't had the best role models. Lots of short marriages that end in hostile divorces in my family.  Right when I thought my life had regained it's stability, my entire life is shaken right to the foundation.  And all I can think is, this can't be happening to me again.

Being a child of divorce is extremely difficult, especially when one parent decides to move away. This kind of childhood would make you think I'd have trouble knowing what real love is.  I know I've read countless articles about how "children of divorce don't know anything about relationships."  But to be honest, I think it's taught me more about them.  What to watch out for, what not to do, and how to make them work.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014


Man was a weird kid.  I spent most of my time playing with Polly Pockets, because "Barbies are lame, mom," or trying to get the newest coolest Pok√©mon cards.  I think this is true for most, you don't really remember much from when you were a kid, but there are a few memories that for some reason just stick with you.

Just a few examples...The horror I felt when my mom picked me up from school with dyed hair (because what kid likes change, right?), the amazing chef of a teenage babysitter I had (all she ever cooked was ramen noodles, but I thought I was eating like a king), and how much that cut on my chin hurt when I tried to shave it like my dad.

Now the funniest memory I can think of is the time I copied not my dad, but my mom.  Her feet always looked so pretty and polished, I wanted to look just as glamorous.  So I lifted my pamper-covered booty up on the counter to my moms nail polish box.  I dug through all of the colors and decided on a bright red.  I hopped up on the couch, and proceeded to paint my ENTIRE foot.  Both of them.  Along with half of the couch.

When my mom discovered my work of art, she rushed the pillows to the washroom.  As far as I know, she used her magic mom powers to wash them clean.  But being the wonderful lady she is, she didn't even get mad at me.  She just laughed.  Of course I was punished, because how else would I learn my lesson?  But she thought it was funny and kinda cute.  I even asked her what she thought was the funniest thing I had ever done, and this is exactly what she told me:  "When you tried to paint your toenails red and ended up painting your whole foot and the couch instead."

Ah, moms.  Gotta love 'em.  And seriously, props to you for not killing me in these past 20 years.

Monday, October 13, 2014


We now live in a world where beauty is determined only by the number of likes under their selfie.  We live in a world believing that we're limited to seeing the world via pictures on a screen.

"I wept because I had no shoes, until I saw a man who had no feet."

That's an old Persian proverb that I'm not so sure holds true anymore.  A quote like that can really make you stop and think, even bring you down to earth and realize how good you really have it.  There are always people out there who are in worse circumstances than you. Way worse. But I feel as though that logic has been long forgotten in this highly consumerized world.  We want stuff, we want it now, and if someone has better, we want that instead.  There's a very important word in our vocabulary that you don't hear too often: appreciation.

And not just with materialistic possessions, but pretty much everything about life.  You can follow anyone you want on all sorts of social platforms now.  We compare our lives to the lives of others based on what we see them post to Instagram, twitter, and Facebook.  People only show the best of themselves on the Internet, which gives the false impression that they always have awesome fun things to do, and look hot doing them.

And I must admit, I'm definitely guilty of this.  As social media becomes more and more prevalent, I can definitely feel a change in myself.  And a change I don't like nor am I proud of.  I see the most beautiful people in the world everywhere I look, in advertisements, in magazines, on my feed as I scroll on my phone.  It makes me constantly evaluate every dimple, every freckle that resides on my body.  Every flaw or feature on my face that I used to overlook, is now magnified when I look in the mirror.  It makes me feel ugly.

There are so many studies that have been done showing a trend that using social media makes us feel unattractive, boring, alienated.  The more you use them, the more envious you get of other people and the "wonderful" lives they lead.

I even get jealous if I log on to bloglovin' and catch up on the latest posts.  First I get upset that I didn't think about writing that first, then I get jealous because their life seems so much cooler than mine.  They're better at writing than me, they're more creative than me, and their voice and look is all cohesive into one beautiful style that keeps me coming back for more.  Something I worry I'll never be able to have.

But then I think to myself, I can do that.  I really can.  I can see the world.  I can write every day, and get better at doing it.  I can learn how to become a better photographer.  I just need to be dedicated.  I can do that.  And who knows where this might take me?  And if it doesn't take me anywhere, what did I lose?  At least I can say that I tried.

If there's something you envy about somebody...their ability, their travels, their healthy lifestyle...go and do that yourself.  Teach yourself to be a better writer.  Go stay at hostels in Europe.  Go running every morning.  Master it.  Make it a part of your life.

That's exactly what they did, so why can't you?

Friday, October 10, 2014


Looking for a real paranormal experience?  Visit these real haunted houses.

What's my favorite Halloween memory?  Pretty much all of them.  I mean come on, it is my favorite holiday.  But I guess if I had to choose which memory is my least favorite, I'd have to say whichever ones my mom wouldn't let me go to haunted houses.  What's Halloween without scaring the living shit out of yourself?

There are so many places to go to celebrate: haunted houses, orchards, pumpkin patches, even the local church for the kids.  But lately I've been thinking of kicking it up a notch.  There are real ghost infested places you can visit, and even spend the night (if you dare).